Weekend

We are back at my parents' house for the weekend. Evan had to work yesterday, but he was able to work from here using his computer.
On the way here, I remembered Nathan's blanket...I had not packed it. I was very upset because the last time we tried to get him to sleep without his blanket (Mommy had washed the blanket and was going to lay it out to dry when it started raining...so it was wet) he was not a happy camper. We ended up putting the blanket in the dryer, which I had not wanted to do, in order to get him to go to sleep. Anyway, there was no way we were going to go back, so we called ahead to have Poppy get a baby blanket for him since they didn't have anything close to a baby blanket at their house. At first Nathan would have nothing to do with the blanket, so I just put the blanket on me. A little later he walked up and grabbed the blanket and put his thumb in his mouth (he was so tired), and he has done fine with it! I think he will be happy to get home and see his own blanket, though. :-)
I think my back is finally starting to get back to normal. Yesterday we walked a lot, and my back only hurt a little bit when we got home. My nurse told me to wait until my next doctor's appointment at least before I start picking Nathan up.
Yesterday was a hard day for me for some reason. I kept noticing every pregnant lady and every person who had a little baby. And it seemed that every time my mind wasn't actively engaged I would be thinking about labor, delivery, and holding Nicholas. Some days I just feel obsessed. I don't know how much of that is normal. I have extremely clear memories about everything since I once again did not have pain medicine (they had me on some pain medicine at the beginning when they were trying to stop everything, but they let it wear off and were about to give me some more when they decided that I should just go ahead and have him...no time for meds). Anyway, today has been a better day. I had a little breakdown in church this morning, but other than that I have been okay.
Here is the song that caused me to have a breakdown:

Matt Redman - "You Never Let Go"
From the album Passion 06: Everything Glorious

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
Your perfect love is casting out fear
And even when I’m caught in the middle of the storms of this life
I won’t turn back I know You are near
And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear? Whom then shall I fear?
Chorus:
Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me

And I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
A glorious light beyond all compare
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
We’ll live to know You here on the earth

Chorus:
Yes, I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
Still I will praise You, still I will praise You

P.S. I copied and pasted the song, so I have no clue how it will look on the blog.